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SECTION 2: QUESTIONS FOR
UNMARRIED THIRD PARTIES
WHO ARE INVOLVED WITH A MARRIED PERSON

To tell what type of affair is in your life,
please answer these questions with information about your
current or most recent affair (or your spouse's). Include one-night stands.

 

 1) Have you separated from your ex-spouse in the past year?
 2) Has your affair lasted less than a year?
 3) Do you feel safer with a married affair partner than a single person right now?
 4) Do you want to marry your affair partner?

Your affair is probably motivated by situational factors if you answer yes
to questions 1 to 3 and no to question 4, your motivation is probably
situational and your affair partner is probably conflict avoidant or intimacy avoidant.

 

 

 1) Is your work a higher priority in your life right now than a serious relationship?
 2) Do you feel safer with a married affair partner than a single person right now?
 3) Has your affair lasted less than a year?
 4) Do you want to marry your affair partner?

Your affair is probably motivated by fear of intimacy if you answer yes
to questions 1 to 3 and no to question 4, and your affair partner is probably
conflict avoidant or intimacy avoidant.

 

 

 1) Do you and your affair partner have a strong emotional connection with each other?
 2) Has your affair continued for two or more years?
 3) Do you want to marry your affair partner?
 4) Is your affair partner having difficulty leaving his or her marriage?

Your affair is probably motivated by a desire for intimacy combined with a fear of being
smothered if you answer yes to questions 1 to 4,
and your affair partner is probably a Split Self.

 

 

 1) Have you had numerous one-night stands or brief affairs?
 2) After the sexual conquest, do you lose interest?
 3) Are you addicted to alcohol, drugs, food or any other substance?
 4) Do you engage in other compulsive sexual behavior, such as porno, or cybersex?
 5) Was either of your parents sexually addicted?
 6) Were you sexually abused as a child?

You are probably sexually addicted if you answer yes
to most of the questions from 1 to 6, and your affair partners are likely to be
sexually addicted, intimacy avoidant, or other singles.